LITERALLY STOP YOUR ENTIRE LIFE AND HANG AROUND THE KITCHEN IN YOUR UNDERWEAR BECAUSE NOTHING ELSE MATTERS.

We’re so close to love.

In just a mere 4 days, we will at long last see the day when the ferocious fivesome known as the Almighty Aloud reunite to announce…something.

How to cope? I’ve got no good advice, apart from cradling a Girls Aloud singles box and sitting in a circle with friends discussing your ayhrlayhust chrayhsmus maymuhrayhs.

BUT WAIT, THERE’S MORE: As if our bodies could handle the sheer amount of anxiety and anticipation for the duration of this week, the girls have decided to fix us up this morning with a teaser video that contains more wattage than 25 electric angels dancing in the rain.

SEXY! WHAT WHAT WHAT.

There they are: Nicola, Nadine, Cheryl, Kimberley and Sarah strutting ferociously with HIGH FASHION BUNS to a CERTIFIABLY BLAZIN’ BEAT, preparing to whip around and turn us all to stone. It’s very “Biology” 2.0 and impossibly amazing.

Who’s ready? Who’s body could possibly be prepared? Hello, did you call me?

No one. No one. No.

Now if you’ll excuse me, I’m off to gift-wrap myself like a kitty cat, dress in red and tie myself to my bed for the next 4 days to ensure that I don’t die before the live YouTube announcement on the 19th.