Press releases shouldn’t excite me as much as they do, and yet I always fall for the impossibly high expectations set by these forsaken products of the hype machine.

Island Records has just released an official press release regarding Utada‘s second English album.

For those of you phased by the highfalutin jargon presented, or are simply too lazy to click (I’m sure you’re not actually lazy, dear reader. I know that the baby’s been crying all day and your great aunt just stopped by for pudding and pie and there’s still more groceries to unload from the bags and–DEAR GOD, WHERE IS THE BABY?!), I’ve summed it up using plus signs and half-sentences so that you mere simpletons can understand.

+ The album (still untitled) will be released on March 24, 2009.

+ Utada finds that to be a bit early.

+ “Come Back To Me” will premiere on Pop Radio on February 9,

+ And will also appear on iTunes.

+ There will be 10 tracks, all of which Utada wrote herself.

+ Stargate produced “Come Back To Me.”

+ Tricky is producing as well.

+ Recording took place in New York, Atlanta, and Toyko.

+ Which means absolutely nothing regarding the album.

+ Utada wants you to dance, but

+ Utada will reference Captain Picard and Winona Ryder somewhere in the lyrics.

+ She feels that sort of depth is important.

We clear?