The Top 50 Singles of 2015
25. Selena Gomez, “Good For You”
Selena embraces those “lower register vocals” to leave her dress a mess on the floor and still look ‘guhiyud‘ for you.
24. Ellie Goulding, “Love Me Like You Do”
Ellie provides a sentimental touch to the soundtrack of a terrible movie based on the book about bondage your mom read with her book club two summers ago.
23. Röyksopp, “I Had This Thing”
Fun fact: I cried to this song more than any other this year. Holy existential crisis, Batman!
22. Hailee Steinfeld, “Love Myself”
Self-empowerment anthem on the outside. Subtle ode to masturbation underneath the covers.
21. Selena Gomez, “Hands To Myself”
Selenita serves breathy staccato seduction above a Prince-lite beat — and blesses us with the best lyrical nonsense line of 2015: “Your metaphorical gin and juice.” Put it on my tombstone.
20. Madonna, “Living For Love”
Madge is gonna carry on…and no amount of stairs or Armani capes will stop her.
19. Loreen, “Paper Light”
The Swedish Queen provides even more powerhouse euphoria by going up, up, up and setting the sky ablaze in a sea of lights.
18. Foxes, “Body Talk”
Foxes crafts a tune that could have been a smash hit in 1985, but still feels just as fresh today.
17. Marina And The Diamonds, “Blue”
Marina makes post-break up regrets and reunions sound misleadingly fun in Froot‘s biggest, boldest happy-sad pop moment.
16. Tinashe, “All Hands On Deck”
Tinashe dances circles ’round her contemporaries from the front to the back…just like that.
15. Adele, “Hello”
A singer effectively swallows the entire world with one simple salutation.
14. Grimes, “Flesh Without Blood”
Grimes lets the critics, haters and fair-weather friends go.
13. Rihanna, “Bitch Better Have My Money”
Professional sock designer embarks on a promising career in music-making. Bitch better have my ANTI in 2016.
12. Justin Bieber, “What Do You Mean?”
Bieber keeps the questions coming in a moody, tick-tocking tropical return to form.
11. Pia Mia, “Touch”
The Princess of Guam pushes all the right buttons, like a perfect companion to Bieber’s newfound lust for all things exotic.
10. Madonna, “Ghost Town”
Madge survives the apocalypse (no surprise there), and leads us all toward the light.
9. Demi Lovato, “Cool For The Summer”
Demi thirsts for cherry-coated summertime sexual experimentation — and somehow also sounds like Heidi Montag while doing so.
8. Taylor Swift, “Style”
[NOTICE: Unauthorized usage of the terms “Taylor Swift” and “Style.” Description removed by TAS Rights Management. See you in court.]
7. Marina + The Diamonds, “I’m A Ruin”
How to lose a guy in three words.
6. Justin Bieber, “Sorry”
Justin’s year-long apology tour culminates with one massive tropical House-pop apology. We forgive you, Biebs.
5. Tove Lo, “Talking Body”
Tove moans and thrusts her way through the year’s finest, most unsubtle ode to fucking.
4. Carly Rae Jepsen, “Your Type”
Carly’s unrequited love for a gay boy results in pristine agony-pop. (Also, LGBTQ warrior.)
3. Years & Years, “King”
Olly and company snatch the crown with one brilliant, Pet Shop Boys-esque blast of synthesizers.
2. Jack Ü, “Where Are Ü Now (feat. Justin Bieber)”
Justin’s experimental, lonesome transmission from a distant planet, helmed by Diplo and Skrillex, provides the blueprint for his pop comeback, effectively changing the entire course of his career. “I need you the most…“
1. Carly Rae Jepsen, “Run Away With Me”
This should come as no surprise. I’ve said all these things before and I’ll say it again: In a better world, “Run Away With Me” would have been the official Song of Summer 2015. It’s the greatest, most pulse quickening, most nostalgia inducing us-against-the-world pop anthem since Katy Perry‘s “Teenage Dream.”
Falling in love feels exactly like this song sounds. Thank you for capturing that magic for us, Carly.