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The “Pour It Up” video has been a long time coming — and now, it’s finally yours for the twerking.

Illuminati Instagram Navy Commander Rihanna‘s Unapologetic track “Pour It Up” is the sonic equivalent of sitting in the world’s loneliest strip club — and that’s exactly what she’s provided in the moody, murky and moist accompanying video.

A narrative? Bitch, #PhuckYoPlot: “Pour It Up” is all about capturing that Mike WiLL Made It-produced sizzurp sound, featuring some truly skillful pole work and marathon twerking by the likes of Nicole “The Pole” Williams, Candace Cane and Secret Moneii.

(And please, don’t suggest that Miley inspired any of this. The video was shot in May.)

RiRi herself strides into the scene like a boss bitch to her golden throne, clad in a diamond-studded top left over from the Barbados Crop Over Festival and a pair of Daisy Dukes that have been pon de laundromat one too many times.

While a majority of the pole work is executed by the trained professionals, RiRi herself takes a spin for a bit, swinging around and flaunting her oft-Instagrammed lady lumps. Mostly though, she’s spending her time tossing dollaz in the air, twerking on her royal throne and searching for a single #phuck to give. (Spoiler Alert: She finds not even one.)

Some might consider the clip too explicit for comfort, but I think it happens to fit the vibe just right, given that “Pour It Up” sounds as equally ominous, ratchet and depressing as the video looks. Yes, it’s a far cry from a PG-rated self-empowerment anthem about fireworks and rainbows, and that’s just fine. The good news is that you have the right to choose the media you consume — even if the message isn’t altogether a savory one.

Now, let’s wade out of the twerk water and get ready for “What Now.”

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What Now” was released on September 17. (iTunes)