nicki-anaconda

The truth is, Nicki Minaj‘s “Anaconda” is probably about to get panned — err, shitted on — by the press. (Early Twitter reactions were, predictably, also a mess.)

Why? Because it’s an objectively dumb song! “Anaconda” is flat out foolishness, not unlike “Stupid Hoe.” But it’s also a knowingly trashy bop, and I’ll be damned if it’s not a good ass time…emphasis on the ass.

First of all, there isn’t a soul who doesn’t know the song it (heavily) samples: Sir Mix-A-Lot‘s iconic “Baby Got Back.” You know it. I know it. That one wasted white girl from high school whose only talent was to climb up on a table and bust out the rap at every house party definitely knows it, too.

But Nicki’s gone and added her own azz-clapping spin to the track, along with Polow da Don and Da Internz. The original track’s been chopped up nicely, the new beats bounce hard in the speakers and Miss Minaj’s verses are as strong as ever: “He can tell I ain’t missing no meals/Come through and fuck him in my automobile/Let him eat it with his grills, and he tellin’ me to chill,” she spits across a hectic beat.

It’s also a direct descendent of Lil’ Kim‘s “How Many Licks”: The dude name-dropping. The aggressive sexual appetite. Sure, she’s not spanking and coming in anyone’s mouth, but it’s clearly inspired by Kim’s 2000 classic. “He toss my salad like his name Romaine, and when we done I make him buy me Balmain,” she brags. Come on. That’s wonderful.

“Anaconda” is nowhere near the harder, “return to roots” vibe we were promised earlier this year with “Lookin’ Ass” and “Chi-Raq.” That being said, it’s also not entirely the clownish, candy-coated EDM fluff of Pink Friday: Roman Reloaded, either. It’s somewhere in between Pop Nicki and Mixtape Minajdom — that wild, cocky cackling toward the end alone is pure “Itty Bitty Piggy” territory.

After the venomous “Lookin’ Ass,” the introspection of “Pills ‘N Potions” and her ferocious “Flawless” remix, there’s something to be said about Nicki letting go, dropping down low and shaking that ass.

Frankly, I’m always here for an ode to the booty.

And if you don’t like it…

THERE WILL BE A$$.

“Anaconda” was released on August 4. (iTunes)