Aloha! 🌴🌺☀️ pic.twitter.com/LnjJJYyQDX
— Britney Spears (@britneyspears) July 23, 2015
Pop feuds-turned-apologies? The MTV Video Music Awards? What is this, 2003?
No, the Legendary Miss Britney Spears simply cannot and will not be bothered. You see, some Exceptional Earners™ are far, far too busy sneaking away to the Philippines Hawaii with their two young sons — and their 2009 “You Oughta Know” live at the Circus Tour And Various Vacations limited edition purple buh-kini (Queen of Conservation) — to be bothered with any Twitter messes.
But just because B-Girl’s jumping over drama and landing on her feet (REFERENCE) far, far away from Las Vegas doesn’t mean that the Britney world ain’t still spinning ’round, regardless.
Some cool and urban things are happening in the name of Britney — as they should be.
Today, Kiddo Queen Tove Styrke — the other cool and talented Tove in pop, that is — produced a loving cover of the Holy Spearit’s iconic 1998 debut: “…Baby One More Time.” True to Tove’s own style, the production is pretty strange and synth-y, sounding more like something of a Scandinavian electro-cross between Royksöpp and The Knife.
Nonetheless, it is wholly loyal and respectful to the original, proving to be another solid offering at the altar of Godney from Tove. Her first? Her song “Number One,” which directly calls out Brit Brit in one incredible line: “Your tears don’t shake my world like Britney Spears / She’s fierce.”
Sadly, it’s not looking like we’re getting that “Tom’s Diner” music video anytime soon. (Can someone just slap a GoPro on her forehead and send her into Tom’s Restaurant uptown to sip a coffee and read a newspaper for 5 minutes? It’s all we need, really. Come on, Larry! Fireworks!)
THAT BEING SAID, visual artist LuigiLuciano has done something quite fantastic to keep the collective thirst of the fanbase temporarily quenched with this truly incredibly well done lyric video for B’s genius Giorgio Moroder collaboration. It certainly takes a much sexier turn than the original song, although an illicit romp in a diner sort of suits Brit Brit perfectly — when she’s not Instagramming Precious Moments quotes, that is. (Thanks to Britney-Galaxy for the find!)
And now, back to your regularly scheduled vanilla candle-lit prayer sessions for the emergence of B9: You’re Gonna Have To Wait And See.