Four epic moments: One epic show.
First of all, can we take a moment to OMG all over Kylie Minogue’s show stealing introduction? In just under a minute, Ms. Minogue makes a fabulous entrance into the BRIT’s with a thirty second, legs-for-days rendition of “Can’t Get You Out Of My Head.” Stunning, flawless…Welcome to the Fever Era 2.0, ladies and gentlemen.
A little later on, the Aloud take to the stage. Within seconds, the five-some piss all over their prior performances of “The Promise” in one gloriously over-the-top, camptastic rendition, straight out of Chicago (and a little bit Return of the Spice Girls Tour for good measure). Sure, the opening bits suffer from a few bum notes thrown out by Drunkie and Judgie. Still–the Girls recover, and by the time the glamorous feathers-n-fluff finale comes churning out, not one performance holds a candle to the Almighty Aloud flame.
“And the winner is…Diana Vickers!” Love it.
Fittingly, the win is secured: The Aloud receive their first BRIT in six years for “The Promise,” winning the coveted Best British Single Award! The crowd goes into a tizzy (Duffy included) as the ladies gallop to the finish line. Sure, Sarah was completely obliterated and Nicola was snubbed out of saying two words into the microphone–but if this isn’t classic Aloud behavior, I don’t know what is.
Well deserved and well played…I LOVE YOU, GIRLS ALOUD!
Finally, the other, other, other epic moment: THE RETURN OF THE PET SHOP BOYS! After a nerve-ridden speech by a fidgety Brandon Flowers, the Boys appear on screen to give thanks for their Achievement Award, only to be drowned out by the audience for a majority of the speech. The screen then gives way to reveal massive cut-outs of their faces as Neil Tennant–going gothic-chic with a rather S&M-friendly, futuristic wrap-around coat, and Chris Lowe–donning massive shades and an un-ironic pink wig (clearly an ode to The Lady B)–strut out to take the stage once more.
And so, come hellfire or Gaga, the Boys pull out all the stops in preparing a whirlwind career retrospective in under ten minutes. From “West End Girls” to “Love Etc.,” the Boys chug right along across their finest hits of the decades. A slew of distractions aid the performance, including an onslaught of ceaseless suited dancers-turned-Agents from The Matrix, as well as colorful videos and illuminations.
Five minutes in the piece the rumors are affirmed as Lady Gaga, looking as though she’d just glued pieces of a Chinese porcelain plate all over her naughty bits, waddles out in robo-mode to take over for Dusty Springfield on “What Have I Done To Deserve This?” Shockingly she delivers, and the set rolls onward without a hitch. Inwardly, the Gaga Love/Hate continues to brew…
Flowers marks his moment soon after, coming in to saunter along to one of my all time favorites, “It’s A Sin.” I won’t lie–He looked absolutely adorable, if not a bit starstruck.
As the show draws to an end, Flowers and Gaga return to the stage to join Neil in bringing the performance to to a crashing, epic conclusion on “West End Girls.” Flowers nervously swings from side-to-side next to Gaga, now frozen in vamping pose, and I cannot help but find myself reminiscing about that awkward couple from the middle school dance. The song ends, the Boys retreat, and the crowd goes mad.
In a word, EPIC.
Most of all, the BRIT’s served to reaffirm what I’ve known true for years now–The British simply do their award shows better. There’s less pressure, more entertainment, and loads more talent in the nominated categories. Plus, the jokes are actually funny. I couldn’t help but lose myself each time Mathew Horne got up to introduce a new act. (“Scream until you prolapse, it’s the Ting Tings and Estelle!”)
So bizarre, so campy, and most importantly–Not so serious. Take notes, Grammy Awards, and lighten the fuck up.
I love the BRITs!
