britney-witch

If there’s anything that pleases Godney more than watermelon bubblegum, hibiscus berry tea from Starbucks, mermaid hair and men sucking her toes, it’s Hallowe’en, the holiday in which we come together as a society to dress up like Britney and give thanks for “Scary.”

The Holy Spearit has served up so, so many cool, sexy and urban looks (lewks) over the years, including Veronica the Witch, Sexy Nerdney and “What’s a sombrero?” Fiestaney. But this year, B-Girl decided to give back to the B*Army/Britney Bitches/Godney Warriors by blessing us with tweets, impromptu meet-and-greets and…handwritten invitations to Las Vegas?!

britney-glitter

While you were out getting Turntina Drunkguilera last night (I was quite literally slaying in the name of Her Madgesty, everything is still a blur), Britney was celebrating #BRITNEYWEEN on social media, calling out selected fans with RTs and faves by calling out some of her favorite Britney outfits — and promising to send these sweeties something special soon.

What special treats? Sorry, you’re just gonna have to wait and see.

Then, she found a random baby girl backstage at Piece Of Me! And the little baby was wearing the “Slave 4 U” 2001 MTV VMAs outfit! Who lets a baby wander around unsupervised in Las Vegas? Who cares! Look at that baby-sized Banana The Snake! We’re seeing the baton being passed to the Future Queen of Pop.

And then Britney stole the baby and took her onstage to hang out with the crew and have a special meet and greet with a rather fancy fellow. Look, that baby-turned-Future Queen Of Pop already has gay fans!

And then, the tireless LGBTQ warrior found even MORE of her gay boys in costume celebrating #BRITNEYWEEN looking quite cool, sexy and funky in their spot-on Circus Tour and “Slave 4 U” lewks. She selflessly gifted them with a flash of that ten million dollar smile (REFERENCE) — in her “Work Bitch” outfit, no less. Heaven on Earth!

But the bass only got BIG-GAH this weekend: Britney pulled a Taylor Swift Chanel-‘o-ween and sent loyal Britney stans — codyspearz and fitlikebritney — her MOST PERSONAL handwritten letters of thanks to date out of nowhere…including invitations to come to Las Vegas.

Honestly, the woman is sweeter than sweet tea.

She’s not just putting in work (bitch) on stage at Piece Of Me, either.

On the exact day of the US release of Blackout (October 30, which you should already have tattooed to your skin or you’re a fake fan), Brit Brit decided to casually send the base into meltdown mode with a casual mention of laying down some vox (that’s studio speak for VOCALS, because Britney is a PROFESSIONAL) on a new #B9 track that she just loves. So much so, she had to capitalize bits of the tweet to emphasize the point: JUST. LOVE. ME.

Wait, that could make for a pretty good song title, don’t you think? You hinting at something, B?

britney-ill-never

If you’ve not yet caught up on the latest Studioney moves, she’s been hitting the booth with Burns and Mischke Butler. This is a very good thing based on their track record with pop stars, and the polar opposite of will.i.am situation. Keep your #B9 prayers going strong.

Going back to black(out), I hope you all celebrated #BlackoutSeason properly last week. It’s been eight whole years since 2007, when we were handed a most perfect opus on a platter filled with promotional X17 stickers, stolen lighters and pink wig strands.

I decided to do a deep-dive into the talented players behind-the-scenes (Miss Keri Baby!) who helped to bring Britney’s dark fantasy to life, so go over to PopCrush and take a scroll through if you have some time. You might even learn something new about the scriptures.

Happy November, y’all. I wish it could be #BRITNEYWEEN all year ’round, but that’s okay: It’s nearly Britmas!

Oh, right. One last thing. For all you eternal Britney and Justin ‘shippers (GET OVER IT ALREADY), B decided to give you a Halloween treat, too. If I ever do decide to have (acquire?) a child(ren?), this is the only reason that I will have one (many?): To make Mini-Britneys.

#BritneyAndJustinForever. That hashtag, tho…

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