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‘Bionic’ Rises to Top 20 on iTunes Albums Chart, Legendtina Reign Refuses to Let Up

BOW DOWN: GET ON YOUR KNEES.

Thanks to a lethal combination of her inspired performance of “Fighter” last week on The Voice, a new promotion in which all of the judges’ albums are now being priced at $6.99, and the extra pressed shade sandwiches she’s been serving every thirteen seconds in her swivel chair, Legendtina has risen like Jesus to #17 on the iTunes Albums Chart with her biconic 2010 release Bionic, sitting well above the latest efforts from Nicki Minaj, Madonna and Rihanna.

Reports coming in from Latin America suggest that fans of the sassy songstress are now desnudate-ing in the streets, while Hasbro has reportedly contacted Aguilera for an upcoming “Bobblehead”-inspired line of toys for LGBT toddlers.

Across the pond in the UK, “Primadonna” chanteuse Marina & The Diamonds has just cancelled the release of her Electra Heart single that shares the same name with Bionic album track “Prima Donna,” explaining to her fans: “I simply cannot compete with that kind of sheer wattage. I have been slayed.”

Asked to comment on her rise to the top of the chart, Aguilera had this to say Excluusively to MuuMuse: “Besos.”

Bionic was released in June of 2010. (iTunes)