When you think of your favorite Selegendary Gomezmerizing jam, what do you think of? Something smooth and seductive, like “Come & Get It”? Maybe a little fever for the dance floor, like “Naturally” or “Slow Down”? Or how about something sweeping and whimsical, like (my future wedding anthem) “Off The Chain”?

Or, do you think of the former Disney princess softly whimpering and breaking down in tears about being unable to let go of a (maybe) emotionally abusive relationship with (maybe) Justin Bieber?

Welcome to “The Heart Wants What It Wants,” a completely unexpected, #SomethingMorePersonal and sort of deeply distressing (yet impressive) shift in sound for the Stars Dance pop princess.

I mean, that quivering voice recording in the beginning: Who was emotionally prepared to hear that from the “Birthday” chanteuse?! It sounds like a toddler being told someone ate all of their Halloween candy, or that Santa Claus isn’t real. It is literally the sound of innocence lost. HORRIFYING. NO, SELENA. PLEASE. PLEASE DON’T CRY. OH GOD. CAN SOMEONE PLEASE GET HER A LOLLIPOP?

Apart from the utterly heart-wrenching introduction, the song itself is really excellent, and sort of humanizes (and matures) the tiny songstress more than ever: Ditching the sugary dance-pop pulsations for echoing finger snaps, distant Lana Del Rey-lite yelps and a chilly tripping beat, SelGo goes on the defense about her rocky relationship, in a move not entirely unlike Britney‘s own with “My Prerogative.” (Coincidentally enough, like “My Prerogative,” this is Selena’s lead single from her greatest hits album, For You. Hmmmmm…)

“Save your advice ’cause I won’t hear/You might be right but I don’t care/There’s a million reasons why I should give you up…but the heart wants what it wants,” she defeatedly declares. Sobridge! “This is a modern fairytale….no happy ending, no wind in our sails!” Oh, the feelings. It’s so good! But just so tortured.

Just when you thought you were going to spin round and round, Selena’s gone and dropped a year’s worth of rain on your parade.


‘For You’ will be released on November 24. (iTunes)